Obfuscating feelings
by lostgirllove
Summary: Sometimes, when I'm alone at night, I wonder if he's listening to my heart beat. Listening to my shallow breaths as I breath calmly while I dream. Is he listening to my blood flow deep in veins? I wonder if he is watching me as I sleep peacefully in my room. I didn't mean to fall in love with him, I fell hard and unexpectedly and it was obfuscating. Rated M for Sex. Damon X OC
1. Chapter 1

For most my life I've lived almost completely alone. You see, when I was 11 my parents died and my older brother and I had to just manage with what we could. My brother, he was already 20 and in university getting all sorts of academic accomplishments and making a life for himself.

With the money our parents left us we managed to get a shitty apartment with low rent, close enough to his university. Most days I was left alone after school. But I'd never stay home. I would be out and trying to have some sense of adventure or childhood to make memories of. There was always one memory but my brother was sure it was a dream. We never spoke more of it. Until things started getting wired and we became aware of things we had never expected.

It turns out his future wife had been a nut job. She's the reason we are where we are today.

It had been years since I last saw my brother and my heart became heavy. With nothing more than video calls and texts to keep me going. I was going crazy. He had been the only one who ever looked after me and i was more than greatful for him.

He left home to go to a small town in west Virginia in search of his ex wife and to go kick some vampire ass. He had gave me the all the documents to the apartment we occupied, assuring all the bills were covered by placing a direct debit into my bank for rent and other necessities.

He left me a bundle of money too to help get me by and I have more than enough left to rent a new apartment.

The thing is... He won't be happy with me at all because I came to mystic falls with news that I'm moving here too. Its lonely living without someone who was basically your best friend and you've been with for your entire life. We had our fights but he was still my big brother.

I retuned the keys to the old apartment, packed my things and headed to mystic falls. My first task was to find my brother and where better to look then the place he tells me he spends the most of his time.

I drove up to a large and very antique looking home. My mouth dropped and marvelled at the beautiful home. Getting out of my black mustang I took a deep breath before gently raping the door. My knuckles helping me to observe the hard solid wood. This place was made with money.

Before I could think any longer the door opened and a girl with brown hair and a kind face greeted me with a polite smile,

"Hi, can I help you?" She questioned kindly and I smiled timidly.

"Is there an Alaric salesman here, by any chance at all?" I spoke sweetly and she immediately straightened and her smile widened.

"you're a friend of ric's?" She asked, the door widening just as her smiled did. Her defensive yet kind exterior dropped and became more relaxed and hopeful.

"His sister actually," I answered and her look of shock wasn't a surprise.

"Oh, he's at the grill, in town. I can drive you there if you like? I'm heading there anyway." She asked and I nodded.

"Sure, ill follow you." I spoke and she nodded happily.

I entered the grill with a mission to find my uncle, I checked each booth, my shoulder length dark blonde, almost brown hair, hitting my shoulders as my green eyes darted from left to right with my head.

When I looked over to the bar I almost lost my breath at the ice blue eyes that were piercing my soul. It wasn't until a few seconds later that I grinned, noticing someone familiar next to him.

Damon's POV:

As I heard footsteps entering the grill I turned to see who exactly was coming in for a drink. I'm not sure why I did it, I put it down to habit, but in truth it wasn't a habit, I felt a pull to the doors like my eyes were magnetised to the entrance.

Elena gently touched her arm and informed her she was going to Stefan before leaving in the opposite direction,

I nudged rick and he slightly spilled his drink, sighing in impatience.

"What, Damon?" he asked and I nodded to the entrance of the grille.

"Hot girl just walked in. defiantly going to be charming the pants off her later." I smirked as I took a sip of my bourbon.

When he finally looked at the girl I noticed she met his eyes and grinned. Ric turned to me and gave me the biggest death stare I've ever gotten, and that's saying something.

"Dude, that's my little Sister!" He spoke with anger and I choked on my whisky, fighting for my breath.

"Well, shit." I breathed and the girl, still grinning, made her way over to us, wrapping her arms around Ric and I couldn't believe my eyes. These eyes haven't deceived me in 164 years and I'm beginning to doubt them now.

Ric, the history teacher/ vamp hunter had a secret family?

"Evelyn ! What're you doing here?" he questioned as he turned and embraced her happily but with a slight concern. I was frozen in shock as I watched the scene play out before me.

"I missed you. Is that so hard to believe?" she scoffed a laugh and my eyes rolled. She's obviously a girly human like Caroline was before she turned. But then I remembered how easy it was to get into Caroline's pink thong and smirked to myself.

"I missed you too but..." Ric looked over to me and sighed before looking back at this Evelyn. "Ev, you need to leave." He responded sadly and her smile dropped.

"What? Why?" she spoke with confusion, shaking her head as her dark locks framed her perfect face. All of a sudden I saw the resemblance of rick in her delicate features. Her sparking green eyes and dirty blonde hair hit me like a brick.

"You know the reason I came here... this place..." he sighed, lost for words and I frowned, watching their interaction.

"Can you give us a minute, Damon?" Ric looked over his shoulder at me and I nodded silently before standing and going to sit at a booth with my drink. But I listened in anyway... I was curious, so sue me.

Evelyn's POV:

"Ric, what's going on?" I questioned with an excited panic.

He ran a hand over his face and sighed heavily.

"Ev... I ..." he sighed and I frowned ever deeper "you cant stay here. Look, this town isn't safe. Its full of vampires and witches and hybrids... you just can't stay here." He spoke sternly and I shook my head.

"you cant expect me to spend my life alone. I need human fucking company." I spoke angrily.

"Evlyn." He spoke sternly and I looked down to my May Jane doc martens that covered my small feet before I looked back to face him,

"I'm staying. And even if I'm not staying with you, I'm staying here. I have enough money get an apartment and that's what I plan to do. I hate that old town we had before and being there alone... forget about it."

"I want to protect you Ev, and I can't do that if you're here." He sighed and I nodded.

"You have taught me to fight and be the best I can be. I can handle myself now. I'm 22 next week ric and I will move here regardless of your blessing. I only have you." I breathed and shrugged.

"look, I'm going to stay at a motel until I find a place. I'm not a little kid anymore." I reminded him and left him in awe as he watched me leave.

"Ev, wait!" he yelled and ran up to me before I left. I turned and waited for him to speak. "Please be careful...and..." he looked up to the ceiling and sighed. "I've missed you." He finished and I smiled, the both of us finally embracing in a hug.

I walked through the town of mystic falls, stopping at an agency to look at apartments nearby. I turned my head swiftly when I headed Elena's voice call out to me,

"Evelyn!" I smiled sweetly and she grinned as she caught up to me. "You looked pretty upset when you left. Is everything ok?" She asked and I nodded.

"Yeh, it's fine. He's just protective of me." I smiled happily and she nodded I her head.

"So, will you be staying with ric? Because I was thinking, he only has a one bed studio. Stefan; my boyfriend, and I were wondering if you'd like to stay at the boarding house with us?" She spoke and I stopped in my tracks with shock.

"Really?" I questioned with awe at this amazing person who was sweet enough to offer her home to me.

"Of course! Ric is a great friend and he's practically family..." She giggled sweetly and I nodded.

"thank you, but honestly, its fine I can stay at a motel." I assured her but she looked sternly at me.

"look, I know what those places are like and especially around here. the next motel is 6 miles out of town. Please, let me take you to meet Stefan. He's back at the house and would be more than happy to help. I practically live there too. It's everyone's home." She spoke and I nodded my head.

We walked and talked together as we got to our cars before she lead the way to the Salvatore boarding house.

During our walk I found that her parents had sadly died and her and her brother were now orphans. Ric, is acting as the amazing father figure that he is.

"Stefan?!" she called out into the huge house and puled me in with her. "don't be shy." She grinned and put her keys down into an old looking bowl that sat on the entry table.

"wow." I breathed as I marvelled at the sight of the house. "this is amazing." I spoke just before a hunky blonde guy with green eyes came down the stairs.

He gave me a polite smile and kissed Elena lightly.

"Stefan this is Evelyn, rics sister, who I told you about earlier." Elena explained and he nodded to me, holding out his hand for me to take.

"Stefan Salvatore. Nice to meet you." He smiled and I smiled back.

"nice to meet you too." I replied and dropped his hand.

"Um, elena, If you want you can go up and find her a room she wants to stay in? I'm just going to get some food in for tonight. I'm thinking Italian." He questioned and she grinned

"sounds great!" Stefan said his goodbyes and left us alone in the huge house.

"so, there are like 7 bedrooms, damons; stefans brother, sleeps in that one." She pointed as we walked down the long hallway. I advise staying as far away from him as possible." I didn't ask why I just carried on following her, "mine and stefans room is upstairs and the other rooms are all free. So take your pick" she smiled and I was shocked at the friendliness she hosted.

"look Elena, I cant thank you enough for this. Its really kind." I spoke, overwhelmed and she waved me off and hooked her arm in mine as she walked me back downstairs,

"what are friends for?" she grinned and I grinned back.

Little did I know I was living with the monsters that lurked in the night.


	2. chapter 2

I sat on the window seat of the room I had chosen reading my book. Elena had gone out to meet some friends with Stefan and said they'd be back later.

After a short while I got bored and decided to take a tour of the house. stefan and Elena assured me that I should feel comfortable here. But for some reason Stefan mentioned not going into the basement because his older brother keeps his old whisky down there that he's protective of. But out of curiosity I ended up down there anyway.

The small and dark stair way was a little scary until I got to the bottom, seeing the rest of it was lit. With relief that it wasn't as scary as I had expected. It was actually really... neat. The wine racks were filled with all the wine and whisky imaginable. I was in awe. The wine cellar led off to another room that, to my surprise, had a door with bars against the window, almost like a little prison. A very large fridge was near the door against the opposite wall and I suddenly began to question what exactly the little prison was for.

As I took one last look and turned around I jumped and screamed in fright. Behind me stood the tall man from the gill that sat with ric. I put a hand to my heart that ached heavily.

"Sorry. Didn't mean to scare you." His comment sounding genuine but his face held a smug look.

"So you must be Damon?" I asked questionably as he watched my every move carefully.

"And you are Evie, right?" he questioned and I nodded.

"Actually, just Ev." I replied and he shrugged.

"I like Evie." He smirked and took a step closer. "my brother told me you're staying for a while?" he walked over to the many bottles of wine and simply selected one, walking back up the stairs and I followed him into the kitchen,

"um, Yeh. I hope you don't mind. And I'm really sorry for snooping..." I spoke and admired his body as he leaned against the counter, opening the wine.

"not at all. I mean this house is huge and practically going to waste anyway. As for the snooping, just remember curiosity killed the cat." He grabbed a glass and poured one before handing it to me.

I took it with a thank you as he grabbed a glass for himself. And I'm ashamed to admit that I got lost for a moment in his eyes.

I'd be surprised if I wasn't drooling by now.

"Satisfaction bought it back." I replied and he smirked with a light chuckle.

"Well, thank you. For letting me stay here. It won't be for too long. Just until I can find a nice enough apartment." I explained and he nodded at me, studying me as if I was a piece of art hanging on a dry white wall. Almost as if I was the most beautiful work of art that deserved to be appreciated for the colour and beauty it adorned against the plain walls.

"Not at all. Make yourself at home, evie." he drawled out my name as he walked past me and disappeared out of the kitchen.

As I got into bed my mind raced back to how he looked at me so intently, his glistening blue eyes full of deviant promises and sexual proposals.

I closed my eyes and I imagined him next to me. I wondered what was beneath his fresh black cotton shirt and sighed in wanton.

I could picture the perfect body of a male model, the V of his lower muscles following to a promising and pleasurable night with him.

I swallowed hard as my hand wondered down my body until I remembered where I was. This isn't my home. This isn't my bed. I sighed and decided to sleep but that dream was full of sex and Damon.

When I awoke, I heard the flicker of book pages and frowned, looking over to the window bench. I jumped up and pulled my sheets up to my neck as I yelled in shock.

"what the hell are you doing?" Damon sat there and waved me off,

"shush, I just got to the good part." He said and I looked to see him reading my 'submissive' book form the submissive series.

"what the hell are you doing?" I asked once again as I looked at the handsome man in my bedroom.

"you have some good books. I think I'll borrow this one." He gestured to the book.

"umm, do you always come into peoples rooms without nocking?" I asked and he paid me no attention.

"is this a series?" he asked and I got out of bed, speeding over to him and snatching the book from his hands.

"yes, and I'd appreciate it if you didn't go through my things." I growled and he stood behind me as I put the book back down on the wooden desk.

"Curiosity did kill the cat after all." I spoke quietly as whispered down my ear,

"Satisfaction bought it back." He remarked and I blushed.

He stepped closer to me again and I was forced out of my day dream of mentally undressing him.

"Anyway, elena said something about meeting her at the grill for lunch." He spoke with a bored expression and I tried not to look up at his eyes, but it was no use. Like magnets, our eyes met and I swallowed hard before he stepped away, taking my book back from my desk and making his way out of my room.

"see you later, Evie." He purred my name and I swooned slightly. "maybe I'll come see you tonight, in your dreams."

I threw myself onto my bed with an exasperated groan and sighed heavily. What a taunting start to my day.

I thought back to last night and remembered how he was much kinder and less forward with me.

I jumped as my phone rang,

"Evelyn, what the hell are you doing staying at the Salvatore's?" He yelled and I sighed.

"Elena and stefan offered for me to stay here until I can get my own place." I answered as I grabbed some clothes from my bag.

"Eve we need to talk. Meet me at the grill and please, stay away from Damon." He stated and I frowned, but before I could respond Damon grabbed the phone from my hands,

"I'll take good care of her Ric. Don't worry your pretty little head." Damon's voice called out and I watched in as he put the phone down.

"Damon, what the hell." I glared at him and he rolled his eyes.

"I just saved your ass." He answered and smirked before taking a sip of his drink and Offering me a smug smile.

"I'll make you a drink, what's your poison?" he asked as he leaned against the wall.

"annoying talkers." I responded sassily and turned to walk away but he grabbed onto my wrist.

"come on, just have one drink. It's all I ask." He whispered down my neck, causing a spark to shoot through me.

I sighed with a bored expression, pretending to not be effected by his presence.

"isn't it a little early to be drinking?" I questioned.

"there's nothing wrong with a little buzz." He spoke suggestively and I nodded, following him down to the bar in the parlour.

"whisky. Neat." I spoke before sitting on the bar stool and he grinned with a goofy look.

"a girl after my own heart." He replied and I rolled my eyes.

One drink turned into 3 and 3 turned into 6 and before I knew it, I was bent over a pool table with Damon behind me, guiding the cue. I giggled when he helped me to hit a ball but it completely missed and failed.

This house even has a freaking pool table.

"you're a terrible player." He shook his head in amusement as he spun me around and took the cue from my hands.

"well, I thought I'd have a better mentor." I spoke with a cocky grin and he narrowed his eyes at me playfully and smirked.

"oh, trust me, I got experience." He answered as he continued to plot the rest of his balls and then the black. I stood in awe. "must just be your distracted." He shrugged and grabbed his drink, downing it in one go.

Before I knew it, my arm was yanked and in a harsh grip. Now facing my brothers angry face, I sobered up slightly.

"what the hell do you think you're doing?" he growled and he snatched the drink from my hand and sniffed it. "really Ev?! Its 4 in the afternoon and you're drunk on whisky?!" he yelled and I squirmed, trying to get my arm back.

"let her go Ric." Damon spoke and grabbed his arm that held my hand.

"she's my sister Damon! when our parents died I promised to look after her. You're supposed to be my friend so what the hell are you doing getting my sister drunk in the middle of the afternoon?" he questioned sternly.

"she was uptight Ric, she needed to let loose a little." he reasoned sternly.

"I thought I raised you better than this Ev. I mean, drinking, in in the afternoon? What the hell happened to you?" he looked at me hurt and I shook my head with shame.

"Ric, I'm sorry! I just..."

"just what Ev?" he asked in the fatherly way he always does.

"we just got along, and I just wanted to have a friend. And for once in my miserable life I felt like I had one." I replied sadly with tears in my eyes. Before he could respond I left them both in the large room and made my way up to my bedroom.

A sigh of relief left me when I locked the door and turned the shower on in the on suite.

That night I slept the best I had in years and for that I thanked Damon. I needed that drink and it turned out to be the best medicine for insomnia.


	3. Chapter 3

The next few days I tried my hardest to avoid Damon for Ric's sake. But even though I was doing this for ric I was still mad at him to a point where I avoided all of his calls and dodged his messages but soon It was time to face the music.

"Evelyn. Will you please stop ignoring me?" he spoke and I didn't respond with any more than taking the seat in a booth with crossed arms. As he sat opposite my I saw Damon out the corner of my eyes, watching, lurking.

"I know you're mad but you just don't know the whole truth."

"then tell me." I argued and he sighed with a nod.

"I never expected to stay away for so long. But so much stuff happened here and the gilberts, they needed my help. I couldn't leave until I had done all that I could because I knew that staying here would give me more information, us more information." He looked me dead in the eyes and I nodded, knowing exactly what he was talking about.

"so, can we go somewhere to talk about the past 2 years here? It's a lot but I know you can handle it." He smiled warmly at me and I nodded, looking into Ric's tired eyes.

I sat with my Ric for the remainder of the night at his studio apartment and he told me everything. From the originals to the Salvatore's, form the witches to the hybrids and from the lapis lazuli to the moon stone.

My mind swirled with my new-found information and with the knowledge of what vampires riddled our town.

I couldn't sleep after I left rics place. I knew Elena and Stefan were sleeping already but I wasn't sure where Damon was, and I found myself pining for his company.

"isn't it a little late for you to be awake?" I didn't even jump at his voice, instead I found comfort and relief.

What is going on with me recently?

"can't sleep." I responded as I sipped on the harsh liquid in my hands. I felt his presence behind me and closed my eyes.

"why? what's eating you?" he asked and came closer, now stepping into the parlour and pouring himself a glass of bourbon. I almost scoffed at the irony.

Not you.

"I found out some things." I sighed and his eyebrows shot up.

"Like..." he drawled, pouring himself a glass of his own.

"Damon, I know. I know your little secret, I know about vampires, I know you and stefan are vampires... I know everything now." I sighed again.

"busy day for you then and at least now I don't have to hide the fact that there's a bunch of human blood down stairs in that fridge you found." He responded and I nodded solemnly. "Out of curiosity, what do you mean by my 'little secret'?" He asked and I shrugged.

"How you're in love with your brothers girlfriend." I spoke silently and for some reason a strong pain struck my chest, making me frown.

"I don't love Elena." He concluded and I frowned in question.

"Then what's the obsession?" I asked quietly and he shrugged.

"Let's just say I intend to make my brothers life a living hell. And what's better way than to mess with Elena head?" He smirked but the smirk didn't reach his eyes. Not nearly enough.

"And why is that?" I asked and he shook his head,

"Maybe another time." He responded simply. All of a sudden there was a shift in his demeanour,

"you know," I looked up at him and found myself mesmerised by his eyes once again. "you're lucky I like you. I don't let any old person drink my bourbon." He winked and I chuckled.

"if anyone is old here, it's you." I chuckled and he looked at me playfully.

"you're goanna regret that." He threatened and I put my glass down before laughing and running away from him and into the library.

I was stunned when his arms grabbed my waist. One minute I had left him in the parlour and the next he was stood right in front of me and I found myself panting on the sofa with soft giggles.

"just so happens, I know you're ticklish." He smirked and my eyes went wide and my laughing stopped.

"Damon, no please! Damon!" I squeaked and he tickled my sides mercilessly and I laughed and kicked endlessly.

When he finally stopped, I was taking deep breaths and trying to calm my erratic heartbeat.

"told you you'd regret it." He smiled and I chuckled.

"you're cruel." I accused and he rolled his eyes,

"nope, just plain evil." He winked and I blushed as he straddled me, keeping me still.

"I don't know if that's entirely true." I whispered in a breath as he kept me pinned beneath him.

He dropped his head to my neck for a second, making my back arch, before lifting his head back up to reveal the veins under his once bright eyes and the elongated canines he adorned.

"be careful who you play with kitten." He warned in attempt to scared me but I reached up and traced the veins beneath his eyes, making him frown.

"I'm not scared of you." I replied softly and he took a deep breath.

"why?"

"because I see you for who you really are. Not all people fall for your hard-exterior Damon." I responded and he looked taken aback.

"you're different... I can't place my finger on it but..." he frowned deeply before speeding to the other side of the room.

"goodnight kitten." He spoke before walking away silently. Leaving me dumbfounded on the sofa.

The next few days remained uneventful. My run ins with Damon were few and my shopping days with Elena and her friends were enjoyable.

I laid my head back on the sofa as I sighed with contempt. Coffee in hand with the sun shining on my face through the tall windows. What more could I as for?

"well you look comfy." I opened my eyes and looked to my left to see Damon smirking, a glass of crimson liquid in his strong hands.

"very." I hummed happily and close my eyes again.

"hmm." He agreed. "so, what're you hiding exactly?" I frowned and looked over at him in question.

"oh, come on, I wasn't born yesterday. 100 and a half-ish years old actually." He mused and I shook my head and got to my feet.

"Damon, I have no idea what you're talking about." I answered and began to make my way into the kitchen with him hot on my trail.

He's hand grabbed my upper arm and he sped us across the kitchen, my back forced against the wall as he trapped me with his hard body.

"I'm not hiding anything." I spoke in a small whisper.

"then why do you feel different?" he frowned at me in confusion and with question.

I pushed him harshly but it didn't move him, instead he leaned down to my eye level. My 5-foot frame towered by his tall strong and muscular body.

"there. Is. NOTHING." I replied with anger and he looked into my eyes.

Shimmering green met ice blue and something drew me into him like an apple falling to the ground. My eyes flickered to his rose red lips and I bit my plump bottom lip.

My breath hitched as he inched closer.

"your heart is going crazy." He smirked and I closed my eyes for a second, trying to stop my erratic heartbeat.

"Do you want me?" he questioned seductively and I held back a nod. "or is it because I scare you?" he said again and pulled back slightly.

His features were dark and evil, veins protruding beneath his eyes and his canines longer than the normal. I took in a deep breath. But it wasn't of fear, it was of lust.

What the hell is wrong with me.

"You don't scare me, Damon." I answered smugly and he raised an eyebrow as his face returned to its natural beauty.

I gulped and dipped under his arm to move away from him,

"What's going on?" Elena's voice rang out between us and then Damon rolled his eyes at elena and left.. "what was that about?" she questioned me, coming closer and I sighed.

"I have no idea. Hostility?" I spoke with uncertainty but she shook her head.

"Ev, you need to be careful of Damon. He's dangerous, all he does is hurt people." She said with urgency and I moved past her.

"I can handle myself Elena. I'll be fine, don't worry." I assured her as much as I could before I left the boarding house for the grill.

I sighed and closed my eye, perching my head on my hand at the bar.

"you're looking glum kitten." I sighed, hearing Damon's voice.

"go away Damon." I responded motionless.

"well that's rude. You're beginning to hurt my feelings Evie." I looked over to him and saw him giving a sad pout and a hand to his heart. I chuckled and shook my head.

"are you coming, baby?" a tall blond appeared from a booth and cooed into his ear. Her eyes were all over him and her hands running along his chest and gripping his hard biceps. I rolled my eyes.

"go and have your fun, Damon." I responded tightly and left him as I walked away.

"Evie, wait!" he called out but I ignored him.

When I got back home I decided that I wasn't going to hang around a feel sorry for myself. my entire day was frustrating and it was all because of Damon.

Whatever happened this morning had me rethinking my morals and what I believe in. did I actually have a thing for a blood sucking asshole? I guess I do.

I stood in front of my mirror and sighed at the heavy eyeliner around my eyes and looked at my outfit. I was in a pair of tailored shorts with a loose white blouse with the top buttons undone, showing the cleavage of my large and perky breasts. The silver hoops in my ear dangled past my hair tied in a scruffy bun. Red lipstick adorned my lips and I was at least 5 foot 4 inches in my black heels.

I was satisfied.

"Ev?" Stefan caught me on my way out the house.

"I'm going to let loose a little, I won't be back too late." I answered and he nodded with a brooding frown.

"just be safe." He responded and I smiled sweetly.

"thanks Stef." I nodded and got into the cab I ordered.

I was slightly drunk as I swayed helplessly to the music surrounding the club. Hot buddies moved together and I smiled as I drowned in the intoxication and the music.

But it didn't last long and I wanted to be alone again. This wasn't the life I was used to. So in result I called a taxi and quietly snuck into the boarding house at 2am.

"Had fun?" I looked into the parlour to see him laying on the sofa, glass of bourbon in hand in front of the fire. A godly sight.

"and what part of it is your concern?" I said cockily and attempted to walk away but almost fell. Instead, Damon's arm caught me and he stood me upright.

"You good?" He asked and I nodded gently. I frowned as his hand suddenly came up to caress my cheek. "You look beautiful." He whispered. I know he didn't expect me to hear it but I did.

"what do you want from me Damon." I breathed as I continued to get even more frustrated each time I saw him. "you keep getting close to me and making these comments and... what's your problem." I finished and he frowned deeply.

"I want to know what the hell draws me to you so much." He whispered back in a small quiet voice. back and I frowned. The sexual frustration was killing me.

"I want to take you and make you scream my name. I want to bury myself inside you while you cum. I want to make you mine Evie." He responded tensely and my breath stopped. "Because something in me needs you. And I don't know why."

"then take me." I breathed back with need and his eyes darkened.

"I can't. "

I looked at him in confusion.

"It's not like I could Ever be what anyone wants me to be anyway. I'm 164 years old for christs sake!"

"I don't fucking care about that Damon. I don't care because I'm sick of this feeling I get every time I see you!"I answered back with desperation.

"And that's my fault?! It's my fault that we have a weird connection? Last time I had a connection with someone they made me into this and I will not make the same mistake again." He pointed threateningly and stormed off.

My head fell back against the wall as I sighed effortlessly.


	4. Chapter 4

The morning after damon and I had our confrontation I decided to forget about it, to forget about everything and start over with a hot shower. And good choices always come from a hot shower.

I stood downstairs moving to the beat of the music as I cooked my pancakes. Elena and Stefan stumbled into the kitchen, smiling and giggling before looking over to me and I grinned.

"hi guys, i made pancakes." I gestured to the three plates on the counter with 3 pancakes each.

"wow, thanks Ev. So, What're your plans today?" she questioned as her and Stefan made their way to the seats up the counter.

"well I'm going to get a job at the grill and I'm going to look at some apartments, if you want to come?" I asked Elena and she gave a sorrowful smile.

"sorry Ev, Stefan and I have school." She gave a week smile and I shrugged.

"it's fine, in the meantime, I need some money to help with the rent." I smiled and Stefan's head lifted up, mouth full of pancakes and maple syrup.

"no, Evie its fine. Were don't expect anything from you. Except to cook for us. Because these pancakes are amazing." He smiled and I chuckled.

"well I'm going to go get a job anyway. Keep myself busy." I grinned and hugged Elena before waving goodbye.

I moved straight to the bar, not looking at anything but my goal. I was a girl on a mission.

"Hi, I heard you have some jobs available?" I questioned a young bartender and he nodded.

"sure, I'll be right back with a form." He answered and I nodded, taking a seat.

"were kinda desperate for a bartender. That suit you ok?" he asked and I nodded happily. "well, just fill this out hand it in and we will get back to you as soon as possible." He smiled before running off to server an old man with grey hair and a happy wife at his side.

I smiled unconsciously and thought of what my life would be like at that age.

"not dreaming about having arthritis and dying surrounded by grandkids, are you?"

I sighed and shook my head. "no Damon, I'm not. I know life isn't a fairy tale... and I'll never get what they have anyway." I sighed heavily, thinking about my position in this life and immediately cut it off.

"why? Hiding something?" Damon frowned at me with question, his big break. He'd finally caught me out.

"no. I'm just not expecting to live that long considering the danger in this town." I quickly resolved my slip up and he smirked at me with glistening blue eyes.

"you know, I can help out with that..." his finger came up to my neck as he skimmed my artery with his index finger, making me take in a breath. I shook my head and batted his hand away.

"I told you, Damon. You don't scare me." I huffed at him but he looked me in the eyes, his hard exterior gone as he suddenly became soft and somewhat vulnerable,

"who said I was trying to scare you." He replied and I took a deep breath.

"I gotta get going. I'm Apartment hunting." I spoke before leaning over the bar and leaving my application for the bartender.

I was walking slowly across the town, considering the windows of stores offering all they have with hope.

"you know, you don't have to move out." I stopped my quest, swinging around to face him.

"don't you have someone else to stalk?" I asked aimlessly.

"actually, no" he answered with a pondering look and I shook my head.

"Did you know you show Characteristics of bipolar disorder?" I questioned casually and he shrugged.

"Well I have experienced a lot of shit."he replied and I smiled lightly. "So why are you moving out?" He asked and I sighed.

"Because it was never set in stone to begin with. Besides, I need independence." I left our conversation there as I walked away to continue my apartment hunting.

I finally found an apartment that was actually pretty close to the grill. It was a two bedroom apartment with a beautiful view of the forest. In fact, I'm pretty sure it was the same forest that the boarding house was behind.

The apartment was completely plain but thankfully it was furnished, so I didn't have to get too much stuff. The sofa was black leather and was soft to touch, whilst the coffee table gave the illusion of a rock boulder in the middle of the room. It was perfect and just my style. Sleek and modern but still gave a cosy feel to it.

I sighed as I sat in the boarding house, waiting for a phone call to collect the keys to the apartment. This was the longest most anticipated day i have endured in a long time.

I greeted stefan and Elena from school with a smile and lunch. They looked at each other before looking back at me with confusion.

"Ev, what's going on?" Elena Released a small chuckle and I grinned at them both.

"I got an apartment!" I squealed in excitement and Elena jumped up, pulling me into her arms and giving me a tight hug.

" oh my god ev that's amazing!" She smiled as Stefan stood to his feet,

"Congratulations, ev." He smiled, embracing me too as I grinned widely.

"Thanks for putting up with me this past few days guys, I really appreciate it." I grinned and Elena nodded,

"Not at all! I'm still throwing you a birthday party here though." She said sternly and I groaned but laughed happily.

I forgot about my dreaded birthday.


	5. AN

Hi guys,

So im thinking of discontinuing this story because i just don't feel like I've written it a good as i could have and I'm not exactly sure where the plot is going. if anyone would like to suggest some ideas then that would be great but for now i think i'm going to need to wait to see if i can come up with an interesting plot unless i decide to discontinue this story al together.

Thank you so much for your patience

~ Lostgirllove


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